Thursday, February 28, 2008

Chin Up

I am feeling beaten today.

I have been dealing with low energy and the feeling like I have been fighting a cold or something for almost a week now. Dealing with Matthew's melt downs, Ryan's temper tantrums, and hubby has been working late all week. The boys haven't seen him since Sunday.

Last night Matthew was up 3 times before midnight and again at 2 am. Then Ryan was up twice after that.

Then, this morning I lost it with the boys at the breakfast table after dealing with another Matthew melt down (he had a drippy nose and was convinced his face was covered in snot, he lost it) They were not eating and we had to leave. I yelled and banged the table with my hand. My thumb immediately started to swell. So not only am I the bad yelling mommy, now I have sprained my thumb.

I get the boys bundled and out the door, but Ryan has a temper tantrum when I try to drop Matthew off.

Get home. Ryan is content to play, I get online. Checking on facebook, I see my sisters profile. My neice (who is not quite 2) has started ski lessons at COP.

I just want to cry. I am so jealous and upset. I want my boys to take ski lessons, skating lessons, hockey, gymnastics, everything and anything they want. But it always seems to be on hold. We won;t put Ryan in until Matthew can do it too. iIt seems every yr we miss out... again. It's just not fair...

And I need to compose myself before I get Matthew in 30 min....
Deep breath, chin up, and onward we go...

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